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The stuff I know about anxiety is plentiful.
Since my first panic attack, I found myself trying to navigate life by just trying to make them stop.
I’ve read the books.
I’ve prayed and prayed and prayed.
I’ve been to counseling.
I have done all the things.
The Bible tells us not to worry.
God’s got this.
I can learn and know all these things.
They do help. Implementing all the things I’ve learned along with diet changes and exercise I can muffle the voice of anxiety. I can function at a good 75% most of the time.
Until the next unexpected thing and the process starts over.
Like a pandemic.
Or a tornado warning, or a medical emergency.
Or any sudden thing that takes control away in the blink of an eye.
I’m sent into flight or fight.
Cortisol levels skyrocket.
The physical symptoms convince me that I may not make it out of this one.
I stay on high alert for any and every little thing. I’m suddenly in danger and everything is a threat.
And I’ve suddenly begun to realize that I’ve done everything except get to the root of the problem.
You can’t implement all the tools to fix the damage when you aren’t looking at the threat. Why has there been damage to begin with? What’s the threat that keeps you off of a solid foundation?
Sure, lifestyle is a factor. But when you’ve fixed all you can and something still just doesn’t feel right, go deeper. Something is not being addressed. In my own life, I truly feel like I will always be battling the unease of anxiety if I don’t get to the root of the problem. And that is exactly what I am going to do.
We HAVE to heal.
Retrace your steps.
What do you need?
What didn’t you get?
Self-reflection is critical to acknowledge the truth. We may not be able to fix the past but we have to face it to grow and evolve. I believe that there are things from our past that have made us predisposed to anxiety and I think in order to completely heal from anxiety we are going to have to address them.